Do Things That Make You Happy

So I'm sick of being a sad sack. So some crap is happening in my life, it isn't the end of the world. And I'm far from alone, everyone has something that's less than perfect going on. What I try to remember is, and this is important: things could always be worse. Keeping that fact in mind I've decided to take advantage of the situation and do things that make me happy.

About a month ago I started this process by dying my hair red, Ariel red not natural red. I've come to the conclusion that right now during my unemployment and before I get to an age where such a thing usually looks ridiculous I was going to dye it. Why? Because I've always wanted to. I tip toed around it in college by dying my hair red without bleaching it first because I was afraid of the bleach. It got a nice highlight that way but didn't achieve the shade I really wanted. This time I went all the way, bleach, Manic Panic, the whole 9 yards.

Which leads me back to my first thought: Do things that make you happy
 
And I mean really happy. It seems like a basic enough concept but every few years I find that I need to remind myself of it. Ask yourself "Am I hurting anyone by doing this?" if the answer is no then continue to the next step and do it already! I know it isn't always so simple, sometimes there's hangups or restrictions in the way, or maybe motivation is a problem. I have a lot of experience with that. As I type this I'm procrastinating on exercising, which I know in the long run will make me happy, but I'm still sorting out my motivation issues (AKA: I'm lazy). But I will do it because I'm making it a priority.

Make it a priority

For a long time now I've been meaning to get into better shape, as well as wear my fancy clothes more often (Gothic and Lolita styles anyone?), take more pictures, sew and make more jewelry and sell it in my Etsy shop, and go hiking/camping more often. I always used to use work as an excuse, like so many of us do. In the last 6 months I haven't been working and guess what? Still none of these things happened! Maybe a little here and there but nothing stuck, why? Because I didn't legitimately make any of these things a priority. I laid around in a depressed lump in my pj's eating junk, while looking for a job and halfheartedly doing chores. It's not all happening over night either, I'm no Wonder Woman and I wont even pretend that I am. Small steps are what's moving things from the "Stuff I've been meaning to do" to "Stuff that I'm working on" because now it's a priority, and even getting your shit together enough to make something a legit priority is a step in the right direction.

Small steps are okay

Mid November I dyed my hair, 3 weeks ago I cleaned my room, 2 weeks ago I waxed my eyebrows, last week I started tweaking my diet to include more fruit and vegetables and less processed junk, I also started researching diet and exercise plans that can help (NerdFitness is really awesome btw). No not all of these are items directly on my list, some things are just precursors. Lets face it, pretty makeup and clothes don't look so great when your eyebrows are a hot mess. Basically I'd like to invite anyone interested in joining me on a life improving mission, lets do this crazy thing already!

Considerations: Weight Loss and Getting Healthy

Almost no one likes to fess up to gaining weight, especially women, particularly me. Well boys and girls it's confession time: Over the coarse of the last year and a half I've done just that, to the tune of about 40 lbs. Now there's nothing wrong with being a plus size lady, that's not where I'm going with this. It's not like "ZOmg I'm such a super fatty chan and I'm ugly and I hate myself! Waaa!" though this post wouldn't be completely honest without admitting that I do have those moments. Really doesn't everyone? Maybe not to that extent but I think everyone catches a glimpse of their reflections, pokes themselves in the belly, thighs, upper arms, butt, or wherever their personal nitpick zone is  and says to themselves "Yuck".

The straw that broke the camel's back came a few days ago at my grandma's house when I got the bright idea to try on my mom's old wedding dress. Now my mom is a very lovely plus size self declared "Short fat Italian lady" though I remember when I was younger and she was thinner, say about the size I am now. So I've been operating under the assumption that I'm about the same size my mom was when she got married, maybe a year and a half ago I was, but not now. So I found out two sad things about mom's wedding dress that day:

1. It doesn't fit, plain and simple.
2. Mice messed it up

So sure, I couldn't have worn it anyway, it didn't fit in a handful of different ways like the torso was too short and I would've had to add a ruffle or some lace to make it long enough. There were also a whole bunch of mice holes scattered around the skirt. More so I think it was the principle of the thing, my relatives were all like "Why would you even want to try that old thing on, it's going to be too big". Not so, and for the last few days I kept it my secret shame while researching diet and exercise plans like a madwoman.
The options I've been considering:

• Calorie Counting
• The Paleo/primal Diet
• Weight Training
• Interval Training
• Hiking

Some of these I've made weak attempts at before, like calorie counting I lost about 25 pounds doing it when I first got home from college. I didn't really change my diet much I just ate less, I also walked a lot then while interning in NYC. A few months later I hit a plateau and got frustrated so I quit, luckily I only regained  about 10lbs of that weight back. I was alright with that for a long time. Fast forward a year to the series of unfortunate events that started in Oct '10 and depression set in badly and I coped the only way I knew how: delicious carby, salty, sweet, and/or chocolatey foods. I know I'm not alone in this, but it doesn't make it any easier to quit doing. Dozens of websites and hours reading research later I know what I need to do it's just a matter of actually doing it.
I don't wholeheartedly know if I can manage the paleo/primal diet, so I'm considering doing a modified version of it. No grains, dairy, legumes, potatoes,  sugars, processed food, omega 6 veggie oils, or chemically altered fats seems harsh and a lot to clean out all at once. I don't live on my own and am at the mercy of my family's grocery shopping habits, and while I do have influence I can't make them buy a whole lot of veggies and fruits so I can eat healthier and I also can't make them stop keeping crap food around the house. It's been a hard struggle on and off for a long time and I have to learn how to keep up willpower.

There are a lot of my dressier clothes that I'm afraid to  even try on like my loli or my ren faire clothes because I'll be heartbroken if they don't fit. Maybe that's the push I need.